Snow White Review: A Dull Disney Remake

PLOT: An enchanted kingdom is ruined by its evil Queen (Gal Gadot). Their only hope is a kind-hearted princess named Snow White (Rachel Zegler), whose youth and beauty are coveted by the Queen.

REVIEW: Snow White has to be one of the most ridiculously controversial movies in recent memory. It’s become something of a political hot potato, with its detractors claiming it would be overly “woke” based on some clumsy quotes attributed to the movie’s star. Whatever those quotes might have promised, there’s nothing particularly incendiary about this retelling of the Disney classic, and there’s certainly nothing particularly woke about it, with it hitting most of the same beats as the original (and yes, there’s still “true love’s enchanted kiss”). However, that doesn’t mean it’s good either.

Truth be told, none of Disney’s live-action adaptations of their animated classics have been winners, outside of maybe The Jungle Book, with them typically watered down and lacking the magic that made them so beloved in the first place. It doesn’t help that Snow White’s been done to death already, with Universal having done a pretty solid action version of it not too long ago with Snow White and The Huntsman (let’s skip the sequel though). The only audience that might really go for this would be very young children who’ve never seen the animated classic.

Otherwise, Snow White is a big yawn, with it feeling strangely padded for a movie that only runs 105 minutes. Despite all the controversy, Rachel Zegler is fine as Snow White, with her fresh-faced look perfect for the kind-hearted character, and she can certainly sing (even if the songs are far from memorable). In some ways, I’d argue that, despite her comments, Snow White hasn’t been updated enough; with her such a naive heroine, it’s hard to invest too much in her. Yet, of the cast, Zegler fares the best.

Gal Gadot’s performance as the Evil Queen is more of a mixed bag. While she looks the part, her line readings are often stilted. When she’s allowed to chew the scenery, she seems to be having a good time, but she lacks the dynamism a role like this is crying out for, with Sigourney Weaver (in Snow White: A Tale of Terror) and Charlize Theron (in Huntsman) having been a lot more memorable. The seven dwarves, which are CGI characters closely patterned on their animated versions, have an uncanny valley look with them, at worst, looking like garden gnomes that have come to life. They could have done something cool with the dwarves, but instead, they’re silly comic relief and not much else.

Snow White’s handsome prince love interest has been somewhat reimagined, with Andrew Burnap’s Jonathan more of a roguish, Han Solo-type, being the leader of a group of bandits, but he serves much of the same purpose as in the cartoon. Of all the characters, The Huntsman, who should have been cool, comes off the worst, with Ansu Kabia playing him as sullen, depressed, and – worst of all – a total wimp. 

One thing to mention, though, is that Snow White isn’t really for us here at JoBlo. More than any other recent Disney movie, this is designed strictly for kids; with it so lacking in any kind of edge, I can’t imagine any child over ten actually wanting to see this. With many other, better, fairy tale adaptations out there, Snow White feels like little more than cash grab. If there was anything about the approach that was once deemed fresh (original screenwriter Greta Gerwig no longer has a screenplay credit), it’s been sanded off, with director Marc Webb having made a pretty dull film (sadly, his first in eight years). That said, I hate to put too much blame at his feet, as this reeks of moviemaking by committee, and in the efforts of pleasing everyone, Disney’s made a film that will please no one. 

Snow White

BELOW AVERAGE

5

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